ENNUI PRAYER
29 April 2008
06 April 2008
Sleep to be Awoken
My father, the man who never had a role in my life, the stranger in the crowd, a phantom of a man, was an alcoholic and, so, by natural psychology, I am at risk of being one. I don’t drink. Never have and I don’t want to. It’s the only goal in my life that I’ve the pleasure to announce I’ve kept. When I was a teen, I never wanted to drink illegally. As an adult, I am the sober man at the party, the loner, the unfunny one, lifeless and devoted to his sobriety. It shocks people to find this out. I’m sure some of you are staring at the screen with uplifted eyebrow questioning my honesty. In fact, the only alcohol I’ve consumed is always a part of a recipe, and never out of a bottle.
read more here...
read more here...
01 April 2008
Bashing my head open, I realize there's nothing left to think...
I didn't write this piece
the words already existed
I simply plucked them out
of the air.
the words already existed
I simply plucked them out
of the air.
27 March 2008
R.I.P. Gnosis
Gnosis, a cat I’ve had since the year that it snowed in the Rio Grande Valley, is dead. I found him under a resting spot in the front yard. It’s apparent that he fell asleep one last time before succumbing to his death. Gnosis is survived by his son, Bloo. He is preceded in death by his daughter Jean and the cat Snow Ball.
He was given to me by my friend, Philosopher.
25 March 2008
Men’s Resource Center of South Texas
Emiliano Diaz de Leon called me yesterday morning to talk about his departure from the Valley, which will happen in June. Emiliano and I met where I met most of my older friends, at the Nueva Onda Poets’ Cafe. I was a writer for The Paper of South Texas at the time and he came up to me and started talking. It seems, and I’m greatly known for this after a reading, I avoided all contact with him before hand. I didn’t do this on purpose, well, at least not to him. Most people who want to talk to me after a reading want to know my genesis and I’m not that sort of writer. At least not yet, or at the time, I should say.
More @ Ennui Prayer....
More @ Ennui Prayer....
21 March 2008
Birthday
As you all know, yesterday was my 25th birthday and I think I accomplished it rather well. Considering my brother (the middle child) didn’t call me, put me off a bit. No matter our feud with each other, we never failed to act like family when it comes to these “special” days. I love my family, and I don’t think I say that enough. I’m hoping to arrange something on Saturday so I can tell my entire family my plans for my future. I also want to discuss another thing I’ve been bottling up inside. I hope to tell my niece as well. If anyone needs to know about the difficult life on the path I’ve chose for myself, it should be her of all people.
read more here...
read more here...
19 March 2008
Wanna read my journal?
Naturally, The Ennui Files is actually the name I took for my journal that I kept in the spring of 2007. It later morphed into what I now call my e-zine. Last year, Jose Skinner had us keep a journal to chronicle scenes in our everyday life. Needless to say, I found myself becoming involved with my subjects that I chose. One, a young couple, of which was my favorite. I became so involved with them in my journal, that for a moment, I lost myself inside of them. I wanted to be them. Share their happiness. I now bring you, what I rarely do these days, a glimpse into the mind of chaos.
Continues here....
Continues here....
17 March 2008
I'm alone now
So Jyg and I are officially broken up. It's over and I think it's time I start gathering the small pieces of whatever life I've made for myself before I lose it all. I have no ambition in going back to school. I know a lot of you probably think I should, but at the moment school is the last thing I want to do right now. Perhaps, I'll just save enough money and go later when I don't have to worry too much about living expenses. Either that, or go to another university. I'm not sure at the moment.
Five long years and I've forgotten how it feels to be single.
Five long years and I've forgotten how it feels to be single.
Don't forget to keep in touch with me @ Ennui Prayer and don't forget to join Ennui Files.
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