R.I.P. Gnosis

Gnosis, a cat I’ve had since the year that it snowed in the Rio Grande Valley, is dead. I found him under a resting spot in the front yard. It’s apparent that he fell asleep one last time before succumbing to his death. Gnosis is survived by his son, Bloo. He is preceded in death by his daughter Jean and the cat Snow Ball.

He was given to me by my friend, Philosopher.

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Men’s Resource Center of South Texas

Emiliano Diaz de Leon called me yesterday morning to talk about his departure from the Valley, which will happen in June. Emiliano and I met where I met most of my older friends, at the Nueva Onda Poets’ Cafe. I was a writer for The Paper of South Texas at the time and he came up to me and started talking. It seems, and I’m greatly known for this after a reading, I avoided all contact with him before hand. I didn’t do this on purpose, well, at least not to him. Most people who want to talk to me after a reading want to know my genesis and I’m not that sort of writer. At least not yet, or at the time, I should say.

More @ Ennui Prayer....

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Birthday

As you all know, yesterday was my 25th birthday and I think I accomplished it rather well. Considering my brother (the middle child) didn’t call me, put me off a bit. No matter our feud with each other, we never failed to act like family when it comes to these “special” days. I love my family, and I don’t think I say that enough. I’m hoping to arrange something on Saturday so I can tell my entire family my plans for my future. I also want to discuss another thing I’ve been bottling up inside. I hope to tell my niece as well. If anyone needs to know about the difficult life on the path I’ve chose for myself, it should be her of all people.

read more here...

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Wanna read my journal?

Naturally, The Ennui Files is actually the name I took for my journal that I kept in the spring of 2007. It later morphed into what I now call my e-zine. Last year, Jose Skinner had us keep a journal to chronicle scenes in our everyday life. Needless to say, I found myself becoming involved with my subjects that I chose. One, a young couple, of which was my favorite. I became so involved with them in my journal, that for a moment, I lost myself inside of them. I wanted to be them. Share their happiness. I now bring you, what I rarely do these days, a glimpse into the mind of chaos.

Continues here....

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I'm alone now

So Jyg and I are officially broken up. It's over and I think it's time I start gathering the small pieces of whatever life I've made for myself before I lose it all. I have no ambition in going back to school. I know a lot of you probably think I should, but at the moment school is the last thing I want to do right now. Perhaps, I'll just save enough money and go later when I don't have to worry too much about living expenses. Either that, or go to another university. I'm not sure at the moment.

Five long years and I've forgotten how it feels to be single.

Don't forget to keep in touch with me @ Ennui Prayer and don't forget to join Ennui Files.

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spread the word

The Ennui Files is looking for writers and photographers to contribute to the blog. Anyone with a WordPress account may contribute as long as they follow the rules. I haven't decided to open Blogger version of The Ennui Files solely because I dislike blogger and enjoy WordPress so much more.

So if you're a writer or photographer or know one who wants to show off their skills, please refer to the links posted above. To be added to the contributor list, please read the rules and follow the instructions provided.

Thank you,
Ennui Prayer

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The Ennui Files

Behold, the power of Ennui.

Yeah, I started writing again, coming out of my cocoon. Anyone who wants to contribute to Ennui Files, just sign up for a WordPress account and then reply to one of the entries with the e-mail address you're using for WordPress. I'll have a writer's guideline as up as I come up with one.

Thank you,
Ennui Prayer

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Case of my Missing (Long Lost) Daughter

The phone calls started sometime last year when I got the new cell phone. It was from Edinburg North High School, my alma mater (just looking for a reason to use that term). The phone call was missed, but the person left a message. I checked it out as soon as I was done with Gallery and as I was trotting towards the English department for Sigma Tau Delta business with the at-the-time chair.

You know the routine....

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An Avenue Q type of moment

I wish I knew Gary Coleman, because then my life would seem better. It seems to make the puppets feel better, so I suppose it would make me feel better. So Gary, come and visit me. We’ll be the best of buddies.

continue reading...

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Dicks on Windows

“Wanna go draw dicks on the dust of cars?” is probably the question that was asked when those fingers slid over the rear window. They had been erased by the back wiper, leaving the clean arc in the powder. The only reason I knew a dick had been fingered in was because the head of a cartoonish dong was still embedded on the dust. I laughed and pointed it out the Philosopher in Theory. She cackle with me, and her two year old daughter looked up and said, in her kid voice, “I don’t get it.”

Sex in cars here....

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Now playing: Dresden Dolls - Coin-Operated Boy
via FoxyTunes

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So you think you can handle this?

I came clean today.

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Now playing: Super Tramp - Take the Long Way Home
via FoxyTunes

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Overslept

I didn’t want to be pulled out of my dream. I can’t remember what I was dreaming, or if it was a good one or a bad one, but I do know I didn’t want for it to end when a close friend of mine, let’s call her The Professor, called me late this morning. She called to inform me that Blane - not his real name - had canceled on her. They were going out as friends later on, but something got in the way. I don’t want to give too many clues out here because this is the internet and it isn’t private or safe. Which is why I refuse to give out names. Anyway, the situation on Friday left her with smiles - I couldn’t tell, really, because it was a phone call and I didn’t see her face, but her voice sounded happier than ever. I suppose things happen for a reason, but what reason this is, I don’t know. I don’t have faith, nor do I believe in a destiny (well, not one that’s out of your hands), but some things just have to happen in order for you to grow and learn in this life. Why? I don’t know, go consult your beliefs.

More here...

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Getting Healthy

I’m not sure, but I think it’s physically impossible for my writer’s body–you know the stereotype body of one who makes a living, or at least attempts to make a living with writing: the Hemingway body, the nice packed flesh that is common with one who sits around and researches and doesn’t have a healthy diet, not that Hemingway was unhealthy - to bend in the way the Yoga lady and the Yoga man asks of me. I’m doing instructional videos, rather than dishing out the cash to take a course. Why yoga? I dunno, of all the calming physical activities that one can do - now don’t let the stereotype lead you to believe that yoga is 100% sweat free, when Darsow had us doing the Salute to the Sun stance, it was straining. I remember a bead of sweat dropping from my nose down to the wooden, supposedly waxed floor, puddling there as a warning - If you’re sweating from here, so are your hands. Not to mention that this piece of exercise, if you wish to call it that or not is up to you, also brought back a high school injury that I’m too ashamed to talk about here.

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